The Best Mother

So I have never claimed to be the best mom...my daughter often says I am, in fact, the absolute worst mom. I don't defend that...I realize motherhood isn't my strongest suit. When the new 7 children get upset with me and tell me that I'm not their mom and I'm mean, I say, "I never claimed to be...daddy and I are just people who were trying to keep you kids together...that is the only thing we promised." At parenting, we are all just trying to do our best--it is all we can hope for that we get it right some of the time; we are human. When I think of great parents, not even my own come to mind, though they weren't too shabby...I try to aim high and I think of our heavenly mother, Mary. I mean, she was without sin, so that has to count for something, right. She probably didn't yell at Jesus for bringing home his friend's yak without permission (did they have yak in the Holy land...that is just stuck in my head cause it was on someones facebook post this week...). But I digress, so when Jesus would come home with someone else's sandals or Joseph yelled for the fifth time that day she needed to get the water before it runs out...She just smiled serenely and carried on. That is a super mom!

The other morning on EWTN, I heard a priest giving an advent reflection which challenged that thought...I have never given birth, but have been present at one or two. I have had my arm clenched tightly by my sister enough to know that the nurses don't give enough care to the coach. I have seen the mess my cat made having kittens---I am not entirely naive. But this priest said, Mary, the mother of our Lord, a woman without sin, put her baby in a manger. A wooden barrel that has held mice and their excrement, been drooled on by hungry animals, and scratchy hay that had been, um, only God knows where. That is not the scene I envision. In the story in my head, Jesus is viewed by his travelling Shepperd friends and kings alike, in a somewhat cozy rustic room. He may be in a manger, but it is an adorable, rustic manger, perhaps covered by some royal cloak from a passing king. Certainly not smelly and NEVER dirty. Maybe I am a little naive...

I have held new babies...after the nurse has cleaned them off, of course. There is a purity about them. I even held my nephew, who was still-born, for several hours...my sister didn't want him leaving the room; we were in shock. But even in his stillness...his death, there was an air of purity and innocence around him. No, I could not imagine putting him in a manger described by the priest. It makes no earthy sense. But I believe it to be. The Priest posited that Mary's partner, the Spirit, let her know that this baby's life would not be easy. Yes, he is a king. But his soft flesh will be torn by much worse than straw.  Don't let him get to comfortable in this life...he has a hard road. Don't coddle him...I believe the priest may have been correct. I am sure that was a part of it. But I have to think that the best mother, the one without sin, would not have thought that her boy needed to learn to get used to suffering. Can we even do that? For Christ to suffer for our sins on the cross would he need first to know the love of his parents, both earthly and heavenly or did it just need to be another day in his life of suffering starting with the manger? I don't think that I will know the answer to that question on this side of heaven, but I have a guess...

All through the bible, we are told that we have to be childlike. What does that mean? Our priest gave me one explanation this week when talking about Mary and Advent. What is the first thing you notice about a childlike child...they are full of wonder and awe and they look to their father to explain it and give direction. Mary did that. When God asked to be his handmaiden, she said, "I don't understand and I am not worthy but thy will be done." And when she was led to a stable to give birth; that cave that smelled like animal and worse...I know I would have been screaming, "haven't I done enough...people are talking about me and Joseph. I rode that animal all the way to Bethlehem. And now you want me to have the baby here...without a doctor, meds, and water...Really!?" Childish, not childlike. But Mary, she just smiled serenely and said, "thy will be done, not mine..." Because her Father said to, she put that innocent boy...the king of kings, her baby boy...she put him in that manger and let his visitors behold him. God made man...the word made flesh...shivering on the hay in the smelly manger. The best mom...

photo from pintrest :)

by meditating on these mysteries of the most holy rosary, we can imitate what they contain and obtain what they promise...

 To get into the Kingdom, we all have to become childlike. To listen to the Father, we have to hear the Father. We are approaching the busiest season in our year, the winter holidays. I am having my family step back from the noise and we are making time during Advent to try and really hear what He has to say to us. We are using the Best Mother to help us; we are saying the rosary daily as a family...sometimes only the family that is present--whoever is home. We have moved out of our comfy living room, saying it sometimes during the busy evening meal prep time...whoever isn't working joins us on a couch and we pray...expectant...trying to hear what our Father has to say to us.

What are you doing to try to block out the noise of the world this Advent? Do you have customs and traditions you can share?


Lord, it can be so hard to hear your voice. Our family is tying faithfully to pray together during this season of waiting and listening for your voice. Tell us what you need us to do during this season. Always remind us to remain childlike and to ask you, our heavenly father, in all things. Help us to choose to do your will, not our own. Amen...