Saturday, April 14, 2012

Mother knows Best?

So I woke up yesterday morning. After getting most of the kids off to school with Shawn, I saw that I had one out of school son sleeping over...must have visited the girlfriend last night and no gas money to get back to his apartment. Another son sleeping in nursing a cold. Two small girls also nursing a cold but suffering from a slight fever, rendering them ineligible for public school today. Grabbing the girls, my phone, and my vitamins, I began I began to surf. While perusing my messages, I found what looked to be an interesting article from a blogger I subscribe to..."Why I don't encourage my girls to follow their dreams..." Hmmm, sounds like something Mariah would claim on her facebook page that I said to her and I took a look. At first glance, I agreed with the article. I absolutely want my daughters to marry, forever, and give being a homemaker a good shot. I feel its so important. Then with a quick glance at facebook which I have completely abandoned this week while fending off flu germs and mourning the candidacy of my favored candidate while he watches his child, sigh...I see that another GOP candidate was crucified in the news by Obama's new press agent who said his wife could not relate to American mother's because she had never worked a day in her life. She was reportedly avenged by none other than Michelle Obama, who gave her the big girlfriend high five. Did I miss so much in just a week of flu germs and Clorox free white vinegar disinfectant wipe-downs. Yes, it was a big mommy week. But isn't it always!


Truly, I was great with Kelly's blog, but I am an adult woman. I suspect that I am an incredibly rebellious adult woman when I agreed with it. My husband would agree that only in my better moments do I agree with her. I was having one when I read it. I could, and should, do better. I agreed with her assertations for myself. Do I think for Mariah, she is correct. While I want for Mariah all the things she claimed God wanted in the Bible...a qualified yes. I think nothing would make me happier than Mariah living her life, for God...with a Godly husband who supports her and their eventual children. Very happy. If that is what she chooses. Because God does allow that choice.
When Hilary Rosen decided to take a swipe at Ann Romney, I am sure she did not expect the backlash that it would create, even before her boss's wife chimed in. Many others have said things that in hindsight, would have been better not to utter. I would have to say that the most ignorant thing that she said was that American women wouldn't find her relate-able...I have never been able to relate to any of the First Lady's...not because they are or aren't mothers, but because they live a life of scrutiny that I cannot even imagine. I wouldn't be able to relate to Mrs. Romney in any way, despite the fact that she has many children, she has stayed home with them, and she has MS. She is a different religion, a different tax bracket, and she has stared death in the eye more than once. There are a million different reasons why I wouldn't relate to her, any more than I did Mrs. Obama. Women need to learn to respect each other's choices in all area's, but motherhood is an area where we should be the most sensitive. There are a million reasons why they need to work or stay home. Express themselves or die to self. Have children or don't...So complicated and so simple...Really. I thought I would die if I didn't have a child...and then I had many at once...this was my life...

Yes, God wants us to obey him. We don't always listen...heck, we don't usually even ask. Some may get that at 18. Others not until they are considerably older. Others may never. I hope, for my daughter's sake, she is closer to the one who gets it at 18. I want my girl...all of my girls to know God enough to have a glimpse of what He wishes for her to do and to have the maturity to decide to go along with that plan. I haven't even begun to think about the other side of that decision...the fatherhood side. Something that neither Miss Rosen or Kelly addressed; the man in our daughter's life that will be the father of the child. If I want for my daughter to commit, for life, to a man, we will need to be praying very hard that he shows up. Right now Mariah's only qualification are that he is "hot." I have a few more expectations. Our society is not making many young people who will fit that bill. Even my own boys are lacking some essential qualities that I would like my prospective son-in-laws to possess. I would not be adverse to Mariah having some marketable skills to fall back on, however, I would like her to be able to use them in rearing my grandchildren. But what will God want for her?
Something that Kelly didn't address in her blog. Sometimes God wishes to use us for things that he didn't plan, but will save the soul of another. Yes, God used those people in the catacombs and it wasn't easy. Some people may have to lose children in order for someone else to be saved. I don't know anything on this side of the tapestry...I do not know what people in my life may have suffered in order for me or someone else to be saved. I believe that God does not cause bad things to happen to us, but I do believe in His sovereignty. He orchestrates all things. I believe that He thinks enough of us to let us die. When we realize that His ultimate aim is for us to live with Him forever in Heaven I think maybe we make too much of all of this. We can never presume to know His will because we could never, not in a million years, know what it really is that He wants us to do. And some things, marry, have a child, homeschool them, nurse, be a teacher...none are intrinsically wrong or right. To say that God wants us to have as many children as possible is to deny God's plan for us, which could be anything because we could never know what He needs us to do. So, I want my daughters to do whatever God needs them to do, whether or not it sounds like what I need them to do. My heavenly father loves all of us more than I can even imagine and we have no way of knowing what He needs us to do...I just pray that we have the stregnth to comply...

1 comment:

Shawn said...

Sweetheart, you have taught our dear Mariah well. Her younger bothers and sisters look to her with major hero worship for all of the right reasons. I look to you my love as a beautiful, strong, smart and spiritual woman that I love and cherish. God Bless You My Love.